Wednesday, April 13, 2011

Life doesn´t always turn out the way you plan

That's a quote from While You Were Sleeping. It's so true. I've spent the last 6 hours looking everywhere I can think for something. I'm pretty sure a little elf or something has walked off with it, but either way, I've been searching and searching. So, now, 6 hours later, I'm laying in bed in the middle of the night thinking about where else it could be, not being able to sleep, so instead I'm blogging hoping it'll clear out my mind a little bit and I can sleep.


Okay, so what does life not turning out the way you plan have to do with searching for something lost? While I was searching, I came across a project that I had done in high school... I did it my sophomore or junior year for my English class. It's called, "My American Dream". Reading through it, it shows what my American dream was. There's a lot of pictures, taken from magazines mostly, some of my own pictures, but here's the captions that it has... "Marriage, temple, true love forever - family - kids, mommy - beaches, sunshine, sunsets, family friends, California, Disneyland - forever friends - beautiful house - pets - great cook."

In high school, I was always the one who everyone said I was going to be married by the time I was 19, one friend was giving me "the benefit of the doubt" and said I'd be able to make it to when I was 21. I wanted my American dream to be marriage, family, kids, being a mom... Don't get me wrong, I'm glad I didn't get married at 18, 19, 20... I've gotten to do some really fun and memorable things with my life, but now, I've just turned 27 and wonder if I'm ever going to get my American dream. I had a poem on the back of my project, it was a requirement to have one. I remember just wanting to finish the assignment and threw one I found on there, but it's surprisingly meaningful now.

The Oyster

There once was an oyster whose story I tell, who found that some sand had got into his shell, it was only a grain, but it gave him great pain, for oysters have feelings although they're so plane. Now, did he berate the harsh workings of fate, that had brought him to such a deplorable state? did he curse at the government, cry for election, and claim that the sea should have given him protection? No- he said to himself as he lay on a shell, since I cannot remove it, I shall try to improve it. Now the years have rolled wround as the years always do, and he came to his ultimate destiny - stew. And the small grain of sand that had bothered him so, was a beautiful pearl all richly aglow. Now the tale has a moral: for isn't it grand, what an oyster can do with a morsel of sand. What couldn't we do if we'd only begin, with some of the things that get under our skin. This is my sand that has gotten in my shell, and someday I'll have all of those things I want and that will become a pearl.


On another note, some of the other things I HAVE found

-I have 11 sets of Mickey ears, and none of them are the same. (ironically, including one embroidered with "Mom" and yes, they were meant and worn by me.)


-I found my certificate from completing a "successful" tandum skydive - do you think they give you a certificate if you complete an "unsuccessful" tandum skydive?


- Pictures of helping my brother install a fan in his house in Chandler, AZ... We've since learned that there's a better way to install a fan than standing on a ladder with a towel on your head, balancing a fan while the other person stands on the otherside and screws it into the ceiling.

-Pictures from all of my dances in high school... I went to a lot, I have a lot of amazing memories with friends, and the random, spontaneous pictures are the best. (I have one of my writing a locker comination on my leg... you can tell it was taken in the moment and so not posed by the angle of the picture and that my head is mostly cut off.)


-I have 64 pairs of shoes/flip flops/crocs in my closet. and yes, I mean just in my closet. I'm sure I've got a bunch more floating around the house. I like shoes! especially comfortable ones like tennis/running/athletic shoes.


- I always have one sweatshirt or another that's my favorite, and I still keep them when I move on to the next. I can look back at them and remember some of the fun times and places I had worn them. Often, I start cycling through them again when I remember why it was my favorite.


-I was once a size 4. wow, that's all I'm going to say about that.


-I lose my remotes more than anyone I know. I lose the remote for my Ihome every few days. It always shows up under my bed, in my sheets, somewhere, so I guess technically it's not lost... It's just 'misplaced'

-I have a lot of books... I love to read, so this makes sense. I know, I could get a kindle and have them all in one place, but for some reason I just love the feeling of holding the book in my hand and turning the pages.

-My favorite Disney campaign was the "Where dreams come true" "Where night is as bright as day" "Where everyone screams at the sight of a mouse" ""Where trouble takes a break" "Where elephants fly" "Where everyone is dying to meet you" "Where everyone is happy no matter what their name" "where the clock never strikes midnight" "Where dead men tell no tales" "Where it's a whole new world"


-The easiest way to make me crazy is get my mind set on something, then have something get in the way so I can't accomplish it.


Alright, I think I've rambled enough for tonight!

(I'm really not as depressed as this sounds... Just found it interesting.)